In the Arms of Another
by the Black Rose
Summary: HYRP. Complete. It's Heero's graduation day, and Relena makes the trip to attend, hoping it means a beginning - only to find out on the way, it may be the end to all her hopes for something more between them. “Heero’s getting married?”
1. The man she loved was graduating into a ...

In the Arms of Another

By the Black Rose

Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing.  I am sadly making no profit on this or any of my other fanfics.  They are written purely for entertainment purposes only.

Author's Note: The more I stare at this piece, the more I realize I just can't make it any better – it's beyond hope.  But for Cheryl, Tsukiyo, and Mel, I am posting it.  If you've seen it on my mailing list, there's not a whole lot changed.  I have added an epilogue, though, at Polgara's request and numerous others insistence.  I may add a side story of the lemon variety for Cheryl and Winggirl…  So, four chapters, plus epilogue, possible future lemon.  It's just about as short as anything of mine gets.  May you find something to enjoy in it.  Thank you so much for reading.  Love, Rose

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Chapter 1

The air in the University auditorium crackled with anticipation. Unfamiliar faces, some showing signs of strain and fatigue, glowed with a sense of accomplishment as they filed across the polished wood floor of the stage.  Relena craned her neck and scanned the crowd, her eyes finally settling on the back of his head. She could pick him out even in the black cap and gown. 

She took a deep breath and felt a little of the excitement burn through her skin, rippling the flesh of her arms into thousands of tiny goosebumps. There were a number of graduates still to go before they got to the one she came to see; the one she was so proud of, the one she loved.  She looked down at the graduation program in her hands and traced over his name, whispering it softly.  "Heero Yuy."

_The Senior Class_

_Of_

_Colonial__Tech__University___

_Announces the_

_Commencement Exercises…_

He had at least thought enough to invite her.  At first she had been so excited, so anxious to see him again. She had been so hopeful that maybe now they'd have a chance to start anew – to explore feelings that she had always held for him, and that she hoped he might have discovered during his extended absence.  And then cruelly, her dream world had come crashing down much in the same way he had once come crashing into her life. On the shuttle flight to the colony for the ceremony, Duo had opened his infamous big mouth. 

_"Hey hey, Princess, what'cha readin?"___

_She glanced up from her copy of And Then There Were None, to give him a smile. "Oh, just an old mystery novel.  I'm on vacation, remember?"_

_"A mystery novel?__  Why not one of those romance things? Or are you getting enough of that from Whitling?"_

_"James and I are friends, Duo.__  You know that."_

_"I know, I'm just teasin ya! Is he still bothering you? Do Trowa and I need to, ya know, take care of him for you?"_

_She couldn't help it.  She laughed.  "No.  He's not bothering me.  Though you'd think he'd get the hint." _

_"Politicians are as obtuse as they get.  Except you, Princess."_

_"Thanks." _

_Hilde__ shifted in her seat, swiveling around to find her missing boyfriend.  She located him with her eyes.  "Hey Duo!  We're only an hour out.  What's the plan when we get to L1?"_

_Duo stood up and started towards the front of the compartment. "Dunno, babe.  Heero's pickin us up, but other than that…You know how he is."_

_The brunette groaned loudly in response.  "Great.  Do you think he'll remember us mortals have to eat?"_

_"Yeah, he'll remember.  And who knows, maybe that fiancée of his will have something planned."_

_"Fiancée?"__ A trio of voices erupted as all eyes focused on Duo.  Relena gasped quietly, her heart dropping into the pit of her stomach._

_"Yeah, he didn't tell you?  Man, I figured everyone knew, since I'm usually the last to be told anything around here." _

_Relena swallowed against the burning lump in her throat; her whole body felt numb as she listened to the nightmare continue._

_"Heero's getting married?"__ She heard Quatre's voice by itself, sounding louder as he started to turn around in his seat.  Duo pivoted back and shot her a look. She glanced away, convinced her eyes would betray everything.  _

_'You should have known.  He never felt that way for you.' _

_"Yeah, some girl he met at school. Name's Kara, I think…."_

Luckily, she had managed to bury her face in her book before the tears had started to waver.  As soon as the shuttle docked, she had donned her very dark tinted, artificial sun glasses – the same shades she wore today as part of her 'disguise'.  But really they served to mask her emotions, her pain, the bittersweet feeling of this moment when she watched the man she loved graduate into a new life, and into the arms of another woman.  

She forced a smile as she remembered how they had seen him talking with her when he didn't know they were waiting for him.  At least Duo had warned Relena, she'd have hated to be unprepared for the sight, and to have accidentally announced her sorrow to the world.  She loved him, but she had no claim on him, and only wanted his happiness.  If this girl would make him so, then she wished them all the best…but it didn't stop her heart from aching for her loss.

Knowing she would be unable to hide her hurt from him despite the dark glasses she wore, she had rushed off to 'urgent business' before he caught sight of the friends he was picking up at the shuttleport.  She didn't think that Trowa was fooled, but it didn't really matter.  She only had to keep up her façade for another half hour or so now, and then she would leave.  More important business had 'come up' for her to attend to, and so she would make a quicker exit from the colony than she had originally planned.

************************************************************************

Down on the stage, the announcers were getting closer to his name.  He wasn't nervous, like most of his classmates.  He was glad school was over, although his plans for the future had not changed since he entered the institute of higher education.  He had stayed in the Preventers as a 'reserve' during his time in college, and he would return to full time active status as soon as commencement was over.  He quickly scanned the crowd looking for a certain blond woman that he had hoped would come, despite her busy schedule.

It was strange, really, how he felt about Relena.  He had never been able to figure it out on his own.  Then Kara entered his life, and as their friendship grew over time, he began to figure out the subtle differences between what he felt for this new girl and the mystery of his feelings for Relena.

He caught sight of long golden hair framing dark sunglasses and smiled inwardly.  She was here, had thought enough of him still to come to this supposedly important moment of his life.  How he had been talked into participating in this 'social' activity, he couldn't remember.  He had wanted to get to work directly and have his diploma mailed to him on earth.  _Earth…_ Every time he thought of it, he couldn't help but think of her…_Relena._  

But something was wrong.  Duo had said she had taken the same shuttle as the rest, but somehow she had disappeared by the time he had come to pick them up.  According to Quatre, approximately halfway to the colony, her mood had entirely changed and she seemed to withdraw from everyone.  He had not seen her once in the two days that everyone else had crawled all over his dorm room, his classrooms, and favorite haunts of the last four years.  

He suspected that Trowa knew what was wrong with Relena, but so far he had been unable to get his friend alone to talk about it.  Kara had been hanging around, anxious to see him as much as possible before graduation.  It was getting on his nerves…but then he found that everything about her had started grating on his nerves since the day she confessed…that she loved him.  He sighed at memory, and at his inability to reply to her professions of admiration.  He didn't love her.  It had taken some time to figure out, but his heart belonged only to Relena. And so far, it didn't look like he was ever going to be able to tell her that.  

_Has she found someone else_? He wondered not for the first time.  Maybe that was why she was behaving so strangely – avoiding him after accepting his invitation to the graduation ceremony.  Would she still evade him when the exercise was over?  He shook his head, and vowed that if he didn't speak with her directly, he'd corner Trowa on the trip back to Earth. 

She couldn't run from him forever, and if it was another man, well he could live with that, couldn't he?  He had only wanted her happiness, even if it was in the arms of another…but then again that was how he felt four years ago.  Seeing her here, now, even though they were separated by a thousand people crammed in a crowded auditorium, he realized he wasn't ready to give her up just yet…

"Heero Yuy, magna cum laude," the announcer called out and Heero moved to take his turn to walk across the stage. 

************************************************************************

She heard his name being called at last, "Heero Yuy, magna cum laude," and began to clap.   Relena wasn't surprised that he was graduating with honors; she knew how intelligent he was.  _He could be so much more than a Preventer_, she thought wistfully, but understood the reasons for his decision.  Having been a soldier, he wouldn't trust just anyone to protect the one thing that was so precious to him – peace.

According to the graduation program, only Amy Zo was left after Heero, and so Relena stood up from her seat to make her way out the door.  She knew she would eventually run into him again, he was supposed to return to Earth after all, but she wasn't prepared to see him today.  She had even entrusted Heero's graduation gift to Trowa, who asked her a thousand questions with a simple look.  Questions she didn't want to answer.

She stopped at the door and listened to the brief closing speech given by the University President, and then slipped out.  She made her way to the exit, where her car was scheduled to pick her up in, she checked her watch, "Oh no!  Three minutes.  What?  How can a blasted graduation finish early?  They always run late!" Relena thought with dismay as she searched in vain for her driver.  

************************************************************************

Heero crossed the stage and received his diploma, shook the hand of the University President, and then went back to his seat.  He looked back at where Relena was sitting and noticed she was no longer in her chair.  Instead, she was moving toward the door in anticipation of the ceremony being over.  _She is going to continue to avoid me_, he thought and felt somewhat hurt by the realization.  He noticed she stopped in the doorway for a moment, and appeared to be listening to the closing speech.  He quickly decided on his next course of action.  As soon as the University President ended his oration, Heero leapt from his chair, running to beat the other grads out the door and to try and catch her before she got away.     

She stood on the sidewalk in front of the entrance hall, waiting for her car. Heero slowed his step, wondering how best to approach the situation when she beat him to it by speaking first.

"Congratulations, Heero," Relena said quietly and turned to face him, those dark sunglasses still hiding her eyes.

"You were leaving."

"I have busin…" she stopped as he reached up and took off her glasses.

"I can't talk to you when you're wearing these," he growled and handed them to her.  He watched her timidly pluck the lenses from his grasp. "You were saying," he pressed.

She looked down at the ground, avoiding his gaze.  "I have business, I'm sorry."

"Don't lie, Relena, you've been avoiding me, and I want to know why," he demanded.    

"I…I haven't, I've just…" He reached out and forced her chin up to where she had to look him straight in the eye.  

"You have.  Why?"

She blinked and pulled away from him.  "I apologize if it seemed that way, Heero.  I just had some unexpected business come up.  But it was important to me that I be here.  I want you to know that I'm happy for you, and I wish you all the best." 

"That sounds like a good-bye.  I'm coming back to Earth, remember?" He said, frowning at her dismissal.  She was putting up an emotional wall between them that had never existed before. She was shutting him out, and it hurt.  He wanted to ask her if there was someone else, but the words stuck in his throat; he didn't really want to know if there was.

            A limousine pulled up alongside the pair. "I'm sorry, I have to go. Perhaps I can meet your fiancée when you bring her with you to Earth," she said and started towards the car.  Her driver held open the door to the back passenger seat as she climbed in.   

_Fiancée?_  His mind raced, trying to catch up with his shock. _Kara, she has to mean Kara, but…_ He finally snapped out of his daze when the black limousine pulled away from the curb, wondering if her misconception had something to do with the hasty exit and general avoidance of him.  He watched the car grow further away as he heard more people emerge from the auditorium behind him.  When it was out of sight, he turned to go back inside.  It was time to corner Trowa. 

************************************************************************

The two silent young men just stood and stared at one another for a moment, once they had finally managed to get away from the others.  Trowa handed him a package, neatly gift-wrapped in navy blue paper that was appropriately conservative for the occasion.  Heero knew immediately whom it was from as he took it from his comrade's hands.

He neatly pulled the tape off the sides of the package and removed the top.  Inside was, just as the box had indicated, a bible.  He looked up at Trowa, but those emerald eyes gave him no answers, instead they just stared at the card that was resting, unopened, on top of the expensive, leather-bound volume with his name engraved in elegant silver ink on the cover.  Heero placed the box down so that he could open the card.  Inside, there was a hand-written note in a familiar, delicate hand.

            _Dear Heero,_

I am hoping this finds you well.  I couldn't be more proud of you and all that you have done with your life to this point.  You have accomplished a great deal, and from all accounts, have taken important steps toward making a life for yourself that I hope will bring you all the happiness you deserve.  

_            Your friend,_

_            Relena_

Heero blinked at the contents of the card and re-read it.  _Friend?__  Did she mean…_ He looked back up at Trowa.  "Why?"

"Many soldiers believe in God, Heero.  I can't promise you'll find all the answers in that book, but you might find someone who has them."

            Heero glared at him.  "You know what I'm asking."  

Trowa returned the look. "It's not my place..."

"The hell it is!  Who told her I was engaged to Kara?"

A smile tugged at the acrobat's lips.  "The only one who mentioned Kara was Duo.  I don't know what he told her, only that it seemed to coincide with the time that Quatre observed a change in Relena's mood."

Heero blinked, digesting the information.  He looked down at the card in his hands, then back up at his friend.  "Is there someone?"

Trowa's mouth curved up into a smile.  "To the best of my knowledge, there isn't."

Heero closed his eyes.  She had waited, but how could she not have known his intentions?  Didn't she realize why he was returning to Earth; why he was re-joining the Preventers?  He frowned; it had been a long time, and his heart ached at just seeing her again.  He wanted to talk to her, no needed to talk to her – the feeling rising within his chest and threatening to suffocate him.  His eyes opened again and he looked at Trowa, positive his comrade could still read him like a book.  

Trowa shook his head.  "The shuttle leaves tomorrow my friend.  She will still be on Earth when you get there.  If you must talk with her before then, there is such a thing as a video-comm," he suggested with a touch of humor in his voice.  

Heero was not amused.  "Fine, but where's that idiot, Maxwell?"

"You can't kill him."

"I won't.  But he'll wish he was dead when I get through with him."

************************************************************************

            There was a tap on his shoulder. Duo turned around with his usual grin, expecting to see a familiar face or perhaps meet someone new on the lawn outside Heero's soon-to-be former dormitory.  Instead, he met with the angry, very solid fist of his recently graduated friend.  He staggered back a couple of steps with the blow.  "What the hell?" He yelled at Heero.  "What the hell was that for?"

            "You know exactly what it's for.  Why the fuck did you tell Relena I was engaged to Kara?" Heero growled and drew back, ready to strike again if he didn't like the answer.

            Duo looked at the floor.  "I was just trying to get under her skin a little – to get her to admit her feelings.  The girl's been, well, lonely far too long, you know.  She always claims she's too busy, but I know her and that look in her eye whenever your name is mentioned.  It's the same look that Kara was giving you that day I talked to you about coming up to your graduation.  She was there, in your dorm room. You introduced us then, remember?"

            Heero lowered his fist and nodded.  His body was still tense as Duo continued.

"It was obvious the way Kara felt about you, but since you'd never admit to anyone if you were in a relationship, I didn't know what you felt for her.  I was pretty sure you didn't love her, but I wanted to maybe warn Relena, just in case."

            Heero just glared at him, anger burning in his dark blue eyes.

            "I'm sorry if messed things up.  I didn't know how she would react, or how you really felt about her. No one knew for sure, not even Relena.  What did she say when you told her you weren't engaged?" Duo asked and looked up from the floor.

            "She left too quickly for me to tell her," Heero growled.

            Duo smacked his forehead with the palm of his right hand.  "Shit!  Man, I'm sorry.  I'll call her and set it all straight, I promise."

            "No, I think you've done enough already.  I'll talk to her when I get back to earth."  He turned around and started to leave, but stopped only a few steps away.  "Duo, is there...has there been…anyone?"

            "I've been on guard duty most of the last four years.  She's never let anyone get close to her," Duo replied, studying his friend's rigid form.  "What about you?"

            There was a short pause, then the former Zero pilot's head lowered.  "I've never met anyone like her."

            "Then you need to tell her that."

            Heero glanced back over his shoulder.  "And you need to put some ice on that eye.  I'll see you in the morning." 

As he made his way back to his dorm to pack, his thoughts were elsewhere.  _Tomorrow, I return to Earth.  _ 

He remembered the deep blue of the ocean where he crash-landed and met Relena.  He had never seen such beauty on the colonies – the dangerous but spectacular waters that reflected the orange hues of his first sunset, and the kind compassionate eyes that revealed such concern for his sake.  _Earth…Relena_…  They were the same, they were his future, they were his home.  He had been anxious the first time he made the trip to Earth. Anxious to accomplish his mission and defeat the enemy; just as anxious as he was now to return.  He hadn't known then what to expect, or what would be waiting for him there, except the promise of his death.  Now it held a different promise. 

_It's finally time…I'm going back. Back to Earth…Relena._

_***********************************************_

_Quick AN: Look for chapter 8 of Love's Labours Lost to appear soon.  ^___^  Thanks for reading!  Love, Rose_


	2. Was it like this for you, Relena? Did y...

In the Arms of Another

AN: All right, sorry, I wanted to post this chapter a while back, but got caught up with any number of other things.  L  I'm very very sorry about the delay!!!

(PS. Terra: I know; you're right.  And I said so in the first chapter, but I think the 4th chapter might be a little…more interesting?)  ^___^ 

Chapter 2

The shuttle flight to Earth always brought back memories.  She couldn't help but think about the first time she saw him, when he appeared as a shooting star just outside the double-paned window; so near, she felt like she could reach out and touch it.  But like the fires of space that melted into the night, the 'little prince' that had captured her heart had also singed her tender soul.  

            She didn't blame him; it wasn't his fault. And she reminded herself that he had never made any promises to her, or declarations of affection.  And yet, she had always felt as though they just knew what the other was feeling.  _Was it just wishful thinking?  Was it my imagination?_  From the way things had turned out, she had to believe it was.  

_            You should have known he only wanted your friendship._

            Trying to distract herself from such thoughts, she pulled out the thousand-page proposal for a semi-conductor on Mars she had been needing to read through.  She knew she wouldn't get much further. The 'legalese' would knock her unconscious faster than a sedative. But that was fine.  Sleep, hopefully dreamless sleep, would be a welcome respite.

            The shuttle touchdown jarred her mind from sleep. Relena blinked and stretched, the memories would not give her mind any relief.  She knew he was due back on Earth tomorrow. As her shuttle docked, and she disembarked, the diplomat could just imagine him helping his future bride down the jetway stairs, and being as protective of her as he had once been of Relena. The thought made her feel slightly nauseas, and so she scolded herself for that, too.  

_You're happy for him.  She seemed very sweet, and she obviously loves him.  She makes him happy.  Stop being so selfish!_

But it was easier said than done.  She shook her head. "I can be his friend. And I'm sure that I…in time…Once I meet her, I mean, I will like his…"_ She couldn't say it without that horrible ache throbbing in her chest near her heart.  _

_I just need some time.  Please forgive me, Heero.  I am not as unselfish as I would like to be.  ___

            She drifted down the long corridor of the shuttleport, her mind churning, trying to dodge the thought of him.  She tried to focus on her work, on that proposal, on what she wanted to eat for dinner….But it was to no avail.  

Her shoulders slumped, and finally let her mind work through how best to handle the situation.  She would allow herself to cry tonight, and start the healing process.  And then…Well, she would have to continue to avoid him for a while.  

_I know it will hurt, but it is for the best__.  She stepped into the car and nestled into the back seat for the long drive home.___

_            I'm sorry…I've just never been as strong as you._

***********************************************************************

            Heero glared out the shuttle window at the giant blue-green planet that loomed larger every moment, but that they just couldn't reach quite fast enough.  He found it difficult not to go up front and take over the controls. Not that he could get them there any faster, he just wanted something to do to take his mind off her.  The quiet was, too quiet.  It gave him time to think, and thinking was not a welcome occupation right now.  Thinking only made the urge to see her grow that much stronger.  He forced himself to remain seated, and wished that he could sleep.

The video-comm blared, interrupting the peacefulness of outer space.

            "Well, this is convenient," Une said in a crisp tone.  "I needed to speak with all three of you."

            Trowa and Duo moved to take seats nearest the comlink screen and then turned to look at Heero.  He glared at them and then dutifully moved to take the chair next to Trowa.

            "Good to see you, Heero."

            "Hn."

            "Well, now that we have our pleasantries out of the way, the Vice Foreign Minister will be making a campaign tour of the Colonies in three weeks.  I want to put together an advance team to make security arrangements at each of the hotels she will be staying in during her trip.  You all leave tomorrow. First thing in the morning."

            "What?  Oh man!  We'll just have enough time to unpack and repack before we have to leave again.  This sucks!"

            The Head of Preventer glared at him.  "Maxwell, I'll write you up for insubordination if I hear another word.  Your shuttle leaves from Canton Airforce Base at 0600.  Be on it, that is an order." Une terminated the connection.

            Heero cursed and stomped back to his seat.  He had planned on seeing Relena first thing tomorrow morning – to make her talk to him and to set things straight between them.  He didn't know what would happen after that, it depended on how she felt and responded to the news he wasn't getting married.  Neither of them were the type that required irrational displays of emotion; they understood each other without needing words.  Well, most of the time, anyway.  Right now, he needed to speak to her, needed to see her and be reassured that she still cared for him before he could even contemplate what would come next. 

            But now, his anxiety was going to be prolonged.  He had to leave too early in the morning to see her before he left.  Sure, Trowa had said he could contact her by video-comm, but he had the distinct feeling this was something that needed to be said and heard in person.  Which is why he hadn't wanted Duo to talk to her for him.  He wanted to see her reaction.  She had never been able to hide everything she was feeling, and so he had always suspected, always counted on the fact that she loved him, but he had never heard her say as much.  He had never needed to hear it before, but with this new chain of events, and the wall she sought to place between them the last time they met, he needed to hear it now.  And over a long-distance connection was not the preferable method.  He scowled out the window and cursed again under his breath. 

            _Relena…_

***********************************************************************

Three Weeks Later, L1 Colony

            "You're going to the L2 colony, Yuy, to handle advance security measures there.  You leave first thing in the morning," Une commanded from his laptop screen.

            "Shouldn't I be here when she arrives?  It seems like while she's in transit, the more security, the better." Heero's mind worked rapidly to come up with a reasonable objection.  He had been on the various colonies working with Trowa, Duo, and Wufei to scout out and prepare preliminary security measures, then determine the appropriate number of guards needed for each location.  They had just returned to L1 to oversee the actual implementation for the first stop on her tour.  He had been planning, for the last week, on seeing her the first night she arrived, come hell or high water, but once again, he was being ordered elsewhere.  He was beginning to suspect it was being done on purpose.

            "That's a negative, Yuy.  You and Barton are to head to L2 and set everyone in position for the next stop."

            "Let me guess, then just before she arrives, I'm to head to L3?" 

            "Affirmative."

            Heero scowled at her.  "May I ask why?"

            Colonel Une raised an eyebrow.  "These are your orders."

            "Are these your orders, or are they coming from someone else?"

            "Your shuttle leaves at 0600.  Out."

            Heero slammed the laptop shut.  "Dammit!"  He heaved up the thin computer and started to throw it across the room.  A hand on his shoulder made him stop.  He turned around and glared at Trowa.

            "You can't blame her, Heero.  Under the circumstances, she needs to concentrate on her campaign.  She can't afford to be distracted by her feelings for you, especially when she believes they are unrequited," Trowa said in a calm voice, as if he was merely reciting the Preventer mission statement.

            The deep frown didn't leave the former Zero pilot's face, but he put down the laptop and felt some of the tension and anger dissipate.  "I just want to talk to her."            "You will get your chance. It just will have to wait a while longer."

            "But how much longer?  And what if…" He didn't finish his sentence, he was letting down his guard, and though Trowa was one of the few he felt he could trust, feelings were still an uncomfortable topic. One he avoided at all costs.  

            "Have faith.  She's waited all this time, certainly you can return the favor," he said and left the room.  

            _Was it like this for you, Relena?  Were you angry with me?  Did you curse me for leaving you while I came to terms with the peace we fought for?___

            He heaved a heavy sigh and moved to the desk to pack up his equipment.  He had an early morning shuttle to catch.

            _You can't avoid me forever, Relena…_

Two weeks later, L4 Colony

            "And the speculation is that Miss Darlian will soon be hearing wedding bells, based on statements made by her frequent escort James R. Whitling the third, a young colony delegate from the L3 cluster," the entertainment gossip show host said with a plastic smile on her face.  "We managed to catch up with the new political couple last night at a charity function they attended together on his home colony." The female voice continued as the television screen cut to a video clip of the man in question, holding Relena's hand outside a large estate.  

            "She's absolutely amazing, and someone I admire greatly," the blond-haired aristocrat said and cast what Heero deemed a meaningful look at Relena. She blushed.  The Preventer felt like throwing up, throwing something at the television, or throwing down and fighting Duo to the death for putting him in this position and then forcing them to watch this ridiculous drivel.  He had heard the stories about her and that James Whitling guy. And the gossip made his hands curl up into fists and ache to pummel anything and anyone in his path into little bits.  But he chalked it up as a rumor, nothing more.  He was not going to jump to conclusions, but he was still in Preventer-induced exile for the moment, and getting more and more anxious every minute.  His concentration on his work was starting to slip, and he felt like he was about ready to jump out of his skin because of this latest broadcast.  Unfortunately, it wasn't over.

            "So, are you two dating? Officially?  There's been a lot of talk," the roving reporter asked the two.  Relena seemed to almost shrink into the background as James smiled broadly and then winked. "Yes, but not for long…"

            That was it.  Heero got up and switched off the TV, his whole body tense as he measured the steps to the monitor.

            "Shit!  Looks like you've been dumped.  Wow, who would have thought…"Duo said. 

Heero swung but hit only empty air.  

"What the hell?" Duo's widened eyes stared back at him.  The former Zero pilot growled and prepared to launch himself at his 'friend'.

            "Heero.  Relax, there isn't anything you can do.  I'll contact Wufei if you want and see what the real story is, but getting upset…"

            Heero stood up, and closed his eyes, waiting for his temper to cool.  He wasn't sure if Trowa's voice trailed off, or if he had intentionally tuned it out.

            "I can't believe she'd date that loser – not after you told her that Kara wasn't in the picture…. I figured you'd be inseparable by now…." 

Red hot flames danced before his eyes.  Calm…calm….

            "Duo, he hasn't told her."

            "What the fuck?" Two hands shoved him backwards.   

"What are you retarded or something?  Why the hell didn't you tell her?" Duo shouted.

            The anger left him in one large whoosh, taking with it all the energy in his body.  It seemed to take great effort to drag his gaze up to meet Duo's flashing eyes.  "When did I have the chance, Duo?  She's pushed me away time after time, always forcing me to leave to the next colony before she arrives.  It's apparent that she's not interested in seeing me right now, and that she has sufficient resources to keep me away until she is ready to talk to me. Whenever that may be."  He turned on numb and shaking legs and left the room.

            He could hear them talking about him through the door, but he was too tired to care.

 "I'll place that call to Wufei," Trowa said.

            "Why bother? He's given up! He could have called her any time."

            "He wanted to talk to her in person.  You can't fault him for that."

            "Well, yeah I can.  He's had four years to say something to her – anything, and he didn't.  Now she's finally decided to move on, and he STILL won't say anything.  Well, if he's lost her, he has no one to blame but himself."

            "I don't think he'd disagree with you on that."

*********************************************************************

L3 Colony that same night

            Relena smiled across the table at her date as she took another sip of decaf coffee.  His dark blond hair that was usually combed back neatly, looked a little ruffled at the end of a long day of political meetings, followed by a charity ball.  James was intelligent and good-looking in a more polished sort of way than Heero with his wild and dangerous air. 

She and James were equals in the political world; they shared a lot of the same views, and had much in common.  He had been chasing after her for quite some time, asking her to dinner on numerous occasions, but she had always refused his advances because of her feelings for Heero.  When she ran into him again a month ago at a social event, he finally persuaded her to let him take her out.  No small factor in her decision was the engaged status of her…her… _Friend_, she thought with a sigh.  

            After the first date, she found herself seeing him more and more.  Being with him took away some of the loneliness that she had never allowed herself to feel before she went to Heero's graduation.  Heero had always been there – his presence felt even though he wasn't physically nearby.  But since the trip to L1, she could no longer feel him or his strength supporting her.  

            "Hey, you look like you're miles away.  Do you want me to take you back to the hotel?" James said from his seat across the table.  

            Relena broke out of her reverie and smiled.  "Yeah, I'm sorry, James.  I'm just tired.  This campaign, all the moving around, packing, unpacking and so on has worn me out.  I'm so glad it's almost over.  Just the L4 colony to go.  It's a shame you won't be able to come with me."

            "Yeah, I know.  I'm sorry about that, but duty calls.  I have that speaking engagement next week on L2 and I had already made arrangements to meet with some of the delegates there.  But I won't be gone too long. And I'll see you at the arms summit in Sanq two weeks from now.  You're still going, right?"  His voice took on a teasing tone.

            She laughed. "To my own summit talks?  I don't think I could get out of it if I tried." 

            "Good.  Then I'll expect your undivided attention," he said and held out a hand to help her up from her seat.

            She shook her head and teased him back. "Well, you'll have to get in line.  Don't you know that every colony delegate expects my undivided attention at these meetings?" Relena took his offered arm as he escorted her to the front of the restaurant where they had been having coffee and dessert.

            "Ah, but I'm a special case." His eyes glanced from one of two Preventers standing at attention in the doorway to the other.  "Do they have to go everywhere with you?"

            Relena looked over at Wufei and nodded to him, signaling their departure.  He brought his hand up to his mouth and spoke into the wristcomm device, alerting the outside guards to the movement.  The light mood dissapated into something more serious.   "Yes, they do."  _Heero…_

            "But don't you find it excessive, and limiting to your privacy?" 

            "If it is excessive, it is only because the gentleman in charge of the security measures wishes me to remain safe.  He'll err on the side of excessive every time rather than leave me unprotected for a single moment.  He is the best," she said with quiet firmness in her voice.  

_            I know you're still protecting me, Heero.  I know you will always keep your promise.  And for my part, I'll let you.  I will stay alive to keep the peace you deserve._

            James saw something flicker in those light blue eyes for a moment, and frowned.  He knew; he could feel the distance that always existed between them, and sought desperately to close it.  But in that moment, she seemed even further away, and it bothered him tremendously.  It had been quite awhile since she had first captured his attention, but over the last few weeks, he had come to realize that it was no longer just infatuation.  He was in love with her.

            The ride back to the hotel was short, and James got out to walk her into the lobby.  She hadn't said much since he had questioned the presence of the guards, and he couldn't figure out why that would cause her to look so pensive all of a sudden.  Underneath the grand chandelier with the sparkling crystalline lighting, her blond hair shone like spun gold.  He had been such the gentleman with her, only giving her a chaste kiss on the cheek or on the back of her hand, but he wanted desperately for something more. 

*********************************************************************

L4 Colony…

            Heero lay on his bed staring up at the bland hotel ceiling and tried to push aside the thoughts of her that he could never fully quash.  He thought of all the times, all the chances he had to tell her how he felt – all of them wasted, but unforgettable.  Every moment he could have said, could have told her how much she meant to him was indelibly ingrained in his memory.  The time on Libra, the moment he had almost kissed her on the abandoned colony, and when he woke up in her room after the Mariemeia incident.  All of them had slipped him by somehow…. 

A soldier was taught that there was no such thing as tomorrow, and yet when it came to Relena, he had counted on there always being another day, another chance.  

_You waited so long, only to give up on me when I finally figured out what I want.  It hurts, but if he makes you happy, then I'll let go.  I have no choice but to let you go, Relena…_

*********************************************************************

L3 Colony…

The couple stopped outside the door of Relena's hotel room, and she wished James a goodnightbefore standing on tiptoe to give him the obligatory peck on the cheek.  As she pulled away, he reached out with a trembling hand, and tipped her chin up until she was looking at him.  She could see the desire in his eyes, as he leaned down to kiss her.  She closed her eyes in acceptance, but in her mind, she heard a familiar voice.

_"Relena…"___

Her eyes flew open and she stepped back. 

"Relena, what's wrong?" He frowned, his expression one of concern.

"I'm sorry, I thought I heard something," she said hastily turning away from him. "Good night, James." She slid her card key into the lock and left him standing in the hallway. She shut the door behind her and slumped back against the wall, fatigue washing over her like breakers slapping against the shore and slowly eroding it away.  

_Heero._


	3. I'm not ready to let her go

In the Arms of Another

By the Black Rose

AN: Chapter 4 will be along soon.  I'm not vouching much for ch 2 and 3, but 4 is a better addition.  Promise.  

On a side note, I'm beginning to feel that most people are interested in quantity, not quality….. I guess I've been worried about the wrong thing.  

Thanks for reading.  Love, Rose 

Chapter 3

            "She's due to arrive tomorrow, I wonder where she'll send him this time," Duo said in a whisper to Trowa across the counter of the kitchen in Heero's hotel suite.  "Will she send him back to Earth or another colony?"

            "She'll send him back to Earth and give him a vacation."

            "Why?" Heero alerted them to his presence from the doorway of his bedroom. They had been talking about him whenever they thought he wasn't listening. 

            "She'll feel guilty for keeping you away from your fiancée," Trowa said, his eyes locking with that of his friend's and communicating a silent message.  'You need to tell her before it's too late…'

            "Hn."

            The video-comm rang right at 0800, interrupting further conversation on the topic.  Lady Une's face appeared on screen.  

            "Commander Yuy, your shuttle leaves tomorrow at 0600 for Earth," she said in a brisk and business-like tone.  "Lieutenant Maxwell and Commander Barton will remain on L4 until the Vice Foreign Minister returns at the end of the week."

            "And my assignment once I arrive?"

            "Vacation. Miss Darlian sends her apologies for not permitting you time to settle in before your most recent assignment.  She has convinced me that a week off to see your family and get situated here on Earth would be agreeable to you."

            Heero's eyes narrowed.  "I'd rather take my vacation here."

            "I don't suppose there is anything that I can do to stop you, but keep in mind that you are not on duty, and as such, are not permitted to interfere with the security measures in place surrounding the Minister.  If you attempt to see her without going through the proper channels, you will face a reprimand when you return." She terminated the connection.

            Heero sighed and ran a hand through the chestnut locks hanging in his face.  He turned to look at Trowa.  "Proper channels?"

            Trowa smirked. "Yeah, in other words, you have to make an appointment."

            "Fuck that! I say risk the reprimand.  You know she won't let you make an appointment!" Duo's loud voice had long passed the point of grating on Heero's nerves.

            The former Zero pilot nodded, then got up and moved back to his room to pack his things.  

***********************************************************************

            Trowa sat down in front of the video-comm monitor and opened a direct connection to Wufei's hotel room.  The Chinese Preventer soon appeared onscreen.

            "Barton," he said in greeting, no expression on his face.  "Are the preparations in place on L4?  We arrive tomorrow at 1100."

            "Wufei, everything's a go.  We'll meet you at the shuttleport right on time."

            "That's not why you called."

            "No.  Is Relena going to marry that colony delegate?"

            Wufei snorted.  "I am her bodyguard, not her keeper.  It is my job to protect her, not take notes on her dates."

            Trowa glared at his friend.  "I see.  Well, just for your information, Une has approved Yuy's presence here for her arrival tomorrow.  He'll remain on the colony until she returns to Earth.  I just wanted to head off any potential problems."

            "Whitling won't be coming with her to L4.  He left this morning to L2 colony.  I wasn't paying close attention to what they were saying, but the gift he attempted to give her did not remain with her.  That's all I can tell you."  

            The corner of Trowa's mouth lifted into smile.  Wufei was as perceptive as himself, and missed absolutely nothing.  He knew that the former Altron pilot had the information he sought, it was just wheedling it out of him.  "That's sufficient.  We'll see you tomorrow."         

            "Affirmative."  The connection was terminated and Trowa went to ease his friend's suffering.

            "I'm not ready to let her go." Heero's voice was quiet and he didn't turn around.

            Trowa stared at his friend's back. That was as much of a declaration of the former Zero pilot's emotions as he had ever heard from the stoic Preventer.  "I spoke with Wufei.  Representative Whitling got on his shuttle to L2 colony this morning.  The indication is that his gift was refused."

            Shoulders hitched, then relaxed; Heero nodded and returned to packing his things. "Understood." 

**********************************************************************

She hated these early morning shuttle flights, mostly because it meant she had a speaking engagement as soon as she arrived.  As she settled back into the cushioned seat and closed her eyes, she couldn't help but remember the events of the previous morning.

            _"Relena, I know we haven't been dating that long, but I can't help but feel that everything happens for a reason." James took her hand and held it to his chest. " I love you, Relena, and hope that you would do me the great honor of becoming my wife," he said with quiet emotion straining his voice.  He gazed down at her as he opened the small velvet box, a hopeful expression ingrained on his features.  Relena gasped and took an unconscious step back, away from the promise he was making to her._

_            "James, I'm sorry.  You're a wonderful man and I care for you very much.  But I'm not in love with you.  I can't marry you," she said softly, and placed her other hand over the one holding hers._

_            He looked away and nodded, folding the lid of the jewelry box closed and then placing it back into his pocket.  "I understand.  Whoever he is, he's a lucky man."_

_            Relena blinked back surprise at his words, but didn't deny the statement.   "Take care of yourself, and I'll see you in two weeks." She moved to give him a friendly hug.  He accepted the embrace and held her tightly for a moment before kissing her cheek good-bye.  They broke apart and she turned to go as he walked off to board his shuttle. _

_ At the jetway door, he turned around to see her continuing down the corridor, in the company of her two bodyguards.  She never looked back._

*********************************************************************

The shuttle landed and Wufei disembarked first.  He climbed down the steps and met the advance guard already stationed on L4; Trowa and Duo met them on time, as promised.  

Wufei's eyes narrowed. "Where's Yuy?"

"Change of plans, he's been given a vacation," Trowa said.

Wufei grunted, then turned back. He ascended the stairs to tell Relena all was clear.  

She opened sleepy eyes and tried to focus on the voice she heard calling her name.    

She sighed softly and closed her eyes again.  "Heero."  She had been having the most wonderful dream.  Heero had shown up to dance with her at the charity ball she had attended with James a few nights ago.  It felt so right to be in his arms as he led them across a familiar dance floor.  The music stopped but they continued dancing; he pulled her closer and leaned forward to kiss her.  

_"Relena…."_

"RELENA!"  Someone shook her shoulders, and coffee-scented breath assaulted her nose.  Irritated, she opened her lids to stare into cobalt eyes.  She blinked a few times before realizing whom they belonged to.

"Duo?"

"Hey, it's time to rise and shine.  You've got a speech to give in an hour, and we've got to get moving.  C'mon," he said, his mouth widening into a smile.

She groaned and sat up from the reclining seat that had been so comfy.  "Okay, okay, I'm up," she said, but the world didn't seem to sit right beneath her.

***********************************************************************

"We already grabbed your things, Relena.  They're in the limousine," Trowa said, his green eyes studying the over-worked young woman.  She nodded and with what had to be sheer willpower holding her up, she made her way off the shuttle and to the waiting car.

After closing the door with her safely inside, Trowa threw a glance at Duo; the braid-wearing Preventer smirked.  

"Wonder what she was dreaming." 

Trowa lifted an eyebrow.  "Well, we know who she was dreaming about."

"Yeah, and it sure wasn't old stuffed shirt Whitling.  Maybe Heero will cheer up a little when I tell him."

Wufei heard the last of the exchange with a grim expression.  "Dishonorable, Maxwell. Gossiping about a woman's dream."

Duo made a face at him as they climbed into the car to follow their charge.

3 Days Later…

            "Where the hell is Heero?" Duo glared at Trowa while they waited for the Vice Foreign Minister to finish her lengthy speech.

            "He's around."

            "Well, I thought he was so gung-ho to tell Princess he wasn't engaged and all, but for three days, there's been no sign of him.  He's going to miss his chance, AGAIN!" 

            A slight smile played on Trowa's lips.  "Oh, I don't think so, Duo.  Knowing Heero, he's just waiting for the most opportune time."

            Before he could grumble anymore about his friend's idiocy in dating, Relena's voice cut into their thoughts.  It was the cue line that meant she was almost at the end of her speech and the guards were to prepare for her departure.

            "Blue team on ready, the Minister will be leaving in five," Trowa said into his wristcom, addressing the team of guards stationed on the outside of the building.

            "I can't wait to go home and see Hilde.  We just have the ball this evening and then Relena has a couple of personal meetings in the morning, right?"

            "That's correct."

            "Good.  Then we leave first thing Friday morning.  I can't wait."

            They heard the deafening applause and moved to their position at the left exit from the stage.  Once she passed through the curtain, she was their responsibility until they had her safely inside the car.  Then, they would follow back to the hotel.

*********************************************************************

She walked swiftly towards the exit.  Duo and Trowa flanked her as they moved down the hallway, through the back exit, and to the limousine.  They passed several guards stationed at various checkpoints along the way.  

Duo opened the car door and Relena ducked her head to sit in the plush leather seat.  She turned a tired smile up in his direction to thank him before securing her seat belt and settling in for the half hour ride.

            He raised an eyebrow in a questioning slant.  "I thought you had out grown stuffed animals by now." 

            She frowned, but before she could ask what he meant, he shut the door and gave the knock on the hood to signify to the driver he could go.  

            Relena sighed and shut her eyes as the car began to pull away from the curb.  The smooth motion of the vehicle soothed her and lulled her into a shallow sleep.  She wasn't sure how long she had been out when they turned a corner and a soft object tumbled into her lap.  

Her eyes flew open and she looked down at the small, brown teddy bear with a dark blue bow tied around his neck.   _It must have been sitting in the seat next to me and I just didn't notice it when I got in.  That explains Duo's comment about the stuffed animals.___

            She picked up the little guy and smiled at him.  He was cute and fluffy with bright blue button eyes.  She hugged him, and settled back once again to sleep.

            _But how did he get here?_ The thought wormed its way to the front of her mind.  She looked up at the tinted window that separated her from the driver, and decided to roll it down.

            "Excuse me.  Um, do you know where this bear came from?"  

            There was no response.

            Relena frowned, an unsettling feeling bubbling in the pit of her stomach.  She turned around in search of the car carrying her bodyguards; she needed reassurance.  But she didn't see the late model Lincoln Town Car anywhere.  Nausea seized her stomach and pumped acid into her chest. They were not heading towards the hotel.

            "What do you want?" She fought to keep her voice low and calm.  Whatever she was expecting, it was not to be handed a cell phone and told by a familiarly gruff monotone to cancel her meetings.  

"You won't be attending."

She looked at the phone in her hand and took a deep breath.  "Heero." She felt the tense strings of the muscles in her shoulders and neck relax. He glanced up and their eyes met for a moment in the rearview mirror.  She looked away. "And what do I tell them?  That I've been kidnapped by a Preventer?" 

            "Something important came up and you had to leave. You're safe and will arrive back on Earth in two days as scheduled."

            "They'll question."

            "I will contact them once we are in flight." 

            "Flight?  Where are you taking me?"

            His closed the separator window. She huffed and sat back, but dutifully made the call to a worried Trowa.  Once she had somewhat relieved their minds and made appropriate excuses to her hosts, she attempted to roll the glass barrier again to hand the phone back.  She wanted some answers.  But the controls were locked.

            _Why would he kidnap me?  What's going on?_ She wondered and felt her insides twist into a large knot.  

_Oh please, I'm not ready to talk to him, yet – not about…about…her.  _


	4. Why did you bring me here, Heero? She s...

In the Arms of Another

By the Black Rose

AN: The last chapter.  Thank you so much for reading.  ~Rose

Chapter 4

            It was a long flight to L1.  A long, silent flight in which Relena's mind raced the entire time, trying to figure out what Heero was up to.  It just didn't make sense.  He should have gone back to Earth to be with his…to see Kara, and yet here he was – kidnapping her and taking her back to his home colony for some unfathomable reason.  The shuttle docked and Heero gave up the controls. He led the way down the stairs and to the waiting car.

            She followed him without a word.  

            They pulled up outside a large, rundown, brick and cinderblock warehouse.  Heero turned off the engine and got out to open the door for Relena.  She stood up and got her first good look at the building.  She had been here before – this was where her father had died.  This was where she met Dr. J, who had told her not to get in the way of Heero's mission.

_But why would he bring me here?_  She wondered as he started to walk towards the structure.  She stared at it for a moment, lost in thought, until Heero apparently realized she wasn't with him and turned around to see why she had stopped.

            He called out to her, interrupting her reverie.  "Relena." Out of habit, she shook her head, met his eyes and smiled.  Then she remembered herself and quickly dropped her gaze.  She hurried to catch up with him on the sidewalk.

            Heero waited for her to catch up then led the way to the door. He placed his thumb on a metal strip jetting out from one of the concrete bricks.  Instantly, a control panel at eye level came to life.  "Welcome," a computerized voice announced. The steel door panel opened, allowing them access to the building.  She wondered briefly about such a rundown old warehouse having a state-of-the-art security system as she followed him inside.

            They walked down a long corridor that ended at a large laboratory surrounded by glass.  There was a door leading inside, but the hallway continued in either direction around the main room.  Her palms sweating, Relena reached out to open the door and walked into the lab.  She turned this way and that, trying to take in her surroundings, but she still had no clue why they were here.  Relena was intrigued. The interior was so different, so much more modern than the outside, it was beyond strange.  

            She glanced briefly at the contents of the room.  There was a hospital bed in the back right corner, dust covered and the once white sheets slightly yellowed with age. A variety of cobwebbed machinery was set up nearby, seemingly innocuous and not wholly out of place.  She recognized a defibulator and an EKG meter.  

Her eyes fell on the last piece and she frowned.  There was a projector set up to the far right, on a pedestal next to the bed, and its screen on the opposite wall.  She crossed the room, and ran a finger over the reel still in place on the projector.  On a whim, she flicked the switch to turn it on.  

Sound warbled as it came to life; the light bulb was dim but the images still managed to seem crisp on the dusty screen.  Haunting music played in time with pictures of an old battlefield.  Bodies of soldiers lie helplessly in bloodstained grass, graphic pictures of the wounded flashed by in quick succession.  An explosion sounded and pitiful cries from the dying men rang out, filling every corner of her mind.  Her blood turned to hard ice in her veins at the horrific images and the bone-chilling screams that were the threads of nightmares.  She wanted to cover her ears and close her eyes, to turn the projector off, but she couldn't move.  

Then, thankfully, it stopped, seeming of its own accord.

            "You shouldn't watch that." Heero's voice filtered in through the panicked sound of her racing heart.  

"It's a level four.  You'll lose your lunch if you've never seen something like that before."

            "Level four?" She swallowed against the lump in her throat before turning to look at him.  He held the reel in his hand, and he turned it towards her to reveal a large four in yellow tape on the side.  She blinked, not comprehending what he was trying to say, when she caught sight of a journal lying open on the hospital bed.  She reached over and picked it up.  The cover was labeled "Desensitization Training."  Frowning, she opened it to the first page and began to read:

_Subject's age:  eight years old.  _

_Name: unknown.  _

_Day 1. _

_I started with a collection of depictions of graphic violence as displayed in mainstream movies, what I will refer to as Level 1.  Subject does not appear to be disturbed by these images, unless there is violence against women or children.  Rape scenes caused an increase in his heart rate, and the violent death of a child, though not real, caused an alteration in brain wave patterns indicating rejection of such behavior.  Will continue on to level two with next treatment._

            Relena brought a hand up to her mouth, her stomach churning at what this journal suggested – that someone had attempted to desensitize an eight year old boy to all sorts of violent acts.  She couldn't believe it….No one could be this cruel, could they? What sort of a man…What sort of a world would allow such a thing as the corruption, the purposeful hardening of an innocent child?  _It's a joke, it has to be… She flipped a few pages and read another entry:_

_Day 12. _

_Still stuck on level two treatment.  Subject reacts violently to the death of innocents, but seems to have become immune to the deaths of soldiers, and even the computer generated enactment of his own death.  His brain wave patterns do not alter significantly when faced with acts of violence against men or soldiers…._

            Her heart sunk further in her chest.  Her fingers fumbled as she turned a few more pages.  

Day 36. 

Subject has finally passed to level three film, but still experiences a significant reaction to violence against women, children, and the infirm.  When he came to the choice portion of the treatment, subject chose his own death instead of killing his enemy.  This will not do.  I wonder if we have made a mistake in our choice… 

Relena looked up from the book. The laboratory wavered for a moment until she blinked.  The movement cooled hot tears in her eyes. "Was this you?" She couldn't get her voice to rise above a whisper.

"Yes." 

She wished she could see him, but he had melted back into the shadowy corner of the room.  She choked back a sob, and with trembling fingers, placed the journal back on the bed.  She couldn't read any more….

Relena stumbled away from that corner of the room, her feet moving too quickly for the rest of her to keep her balance.  Her mind raced, desperate to forget the horrible images she had experienced for a brief moment.  She didn't want to think about how Heero had been forced to watch such images as part of his training.  

She moved towards the desk that was pushed against the wall only a few feet away, papers stacked in disorderly piles; there was another journal lying open.  She stared, unable to make her hand reach out to it.  

She glanced over her shoulder, asking him with her eyes – for permission, for absolution from this nightmare….  He nodded and a wave of nausea crashed against her body.  With shaking hands, she picked up the book and read the cover:  "Genetic enhancement therapies on a live subject."

She almost dropped it.  The weight was too heavy in her palm.  She didn't want to know….

But Heero had brought her here for this, she was sure of it.  He needed her to see these things, but why?  Whatever his reason was, she owed him at least this much.  She had to be strong.  She took a deep breath, and opened the cover.  

_Subject age: eight years old.  _

_Name: unknown.  _

_Week 1, Day 1. _

_Will attempt genetic enhancements to speed up regenerative process, and stimulate growth.  Subject's age is exactly what our research indicates is key to surviving the therapies, as anesthesia could corrupt the chemicals, and significant amounts of pain will be involved.  It is likely the intense pain will cause some memory loss, but we will attempt to stimulate the growth of synapses essential to learning and memory, so it will be interesting to see how much he will remember at the end of the treatments._

"Oh God…" A tear escaped from the corner of her eye and her whole body began to quake.  Though her vision continued to swim, she turned the page with cold fingers that seemed to belong to someone else.

_Week 17, Day 1._

_ Subject's body seems to have finally stabilized after the week 12 treatment. It's unexplained why he survived at all.  The error in calculation could not be reversed and I feared all progress might have been lost.  He does not remember me, or any of the things he told me of what happened to him prior to the time I found him. It is unknown whether this memory loss will be permanent. _

_We will begin the tests on how quickly his body will regenerate bone tissue in the next phase.  I will compare the notes on blood flow and control recovery time pre-therapy for the broken right radius induced in week 1, with the post-therapy fracture he will endure tomorrow.  _

            The book tumbled from her hands.  "How could they?"  She murmured.  Her breath came in gasps as the walls seemed to grow closer, suffocating her.  She didn't want to think that these people, these monsters, had treated a child, any child - but especially the one that she had come to know and love with all her heart - like nothing more than a guinea pig or lab rat.  

Relena caught her breath as anger stormed into her heart, pushing aside guilt and sorrow in its path.  "How dare they?" Tears coursed down her cheeks as rage shook her spine and clenched her fists.  "How dare anyone play God like that!"   

She tore from the room; one question kept repeating in her mind: "Why?"  But nothing seemed to hold the answer.  She ran, wanting to escape, but took a wrong turn down one of the hallways.  She slowed as she came to a smaller lab room, but couldn't force herself to enter.  A glass window peered inside, most likely by design.  

It was empty, save for a lone hospital bed with restraints.  An image appeared before her eyes - of Heero at eight years old struggling against those chains, crying for help, but with no one around to hear his pleas.  It sapped the last of her strength.  She wasn't strong enough; she could have never endured all that he had.  Her heart bled, and she wiped at her tears, stumbling blindly further down the hall.  

            She finally came to a small room with no door. It was bare except for a mattress on the ground in the far corner.  She stepped inside, but tripped over a dim lump in her path.  She turned and found a dingy old teddy bear staring up at her with chewed black eyes. She knelt down to pick it up and as she stood, she could feel his presence behind her.  "Was this your room?" She asked, and tried to keep her voice from shaking. She tightened her hold on the worn, brown bear.

            "One of them.  I didn't have a room."

            She turned to face him then, cradling the stuffed animal in her arms.  He stood in the hallway, leaning back against the wall, half hidden in darkness.  "You didn't have a room?" She opened her mouth to ask a thousand other questions, but they stuck in her throat.

            "I spent each night in a different room.  Some of them had a bed. Sometimes, I slept on the floor.  They didn't want me to have any semblance of belonging, as a soldier is always transient during a war."

            "But you were just a child!" 

He didn't respond.  

Relena held the teddy bear out to him.  "Was he yours?"

            "Yes.  I brought it back from a mission, and had to hide it to keep it from being taken away.  I wasn't allowed to own anything.  Even my clothes were handed back to Dr. J at the end of the day."

            "But Heero, why?  Why would they do this to you? Why would you let them?"

            There was a long pause, and Relena was afraid for a moment that she had said something wrong.

"Why?  They trained me to fight so that others wouldn't have to. I let them because it was better for me to suffer than someone else whose life was worth more than mine." His voice was even, calm, a deep contrast to her own emotionally-charged outburst.  She felt like a child being chided by her father, and turned away to hide her feelings of shame.

            _Heero_, she cried out in her mind, but kept silent as she stepped back into the hallway.  She wanted desperately to reach out to him, to take away all the hurt and the pain of his past, but it wasn't her place.  He had chosen another to give his heart to, and perhaps she had already eased his restless soul.  

She walked on jelly legs down the corridor towards the main laboratory.  She was ready to leave, but Heero took the lead and opened the door, holding it for her to enter.  She noticed that there was a large pile of papers on the floor, the desk cleared off, and some rolls of what looked like blueprints.  Several movie reels lay on top of the pile, marked with the same yellow tape as the one she had seen.

            "Stay here," he commanded and left the room.  When Heero returned, he was carrying a metal trash barrel.  He set it down next to the outside window.   Strong fingers unlatched the glass and lifted the pane, then pushed aside the outside shutters covering the opening.  He walked over to the pile of papers and threw a large stack into the container. A lighter appeared from his pocket, and he held its flame to a lone sheet.  Once the paper had caught, he dropped it in with the others.  They instantly lit, but quickly died.  Heero frowned, and moved over to a far cabinet against the wall.  He threw open the doors and rummaged around, searching for something.  He came back with lighter fluid, a few pieces of kindling and several strips of newsprint.   

            At once comprehending his intention, Relena stirred from her place near the door to help him start the fire.  Before long, orange flames were crackling; it was growing dark outside, and the only light in the room besides what trickled in from the front of the building was the fire flickering in the trash bin and casting long, deep shadows against the concrete walls.

            Heero picked up one of the rolls of blueprints, lit the ammonia-soaked paper and tossed it into the blaze. He stared after it, as if mesmerized by the intensity and glow of the tongues of fire as they consumed his offering.

            Relena watched him, trying to decipher the dangerous mystery of who he really was. She had been given a glimpse of a past she had known existed in the back of her mind, but denied for what she had to admit were her own selfish reasons. She hadn't wanted to know....

She traced the taut lines of his face with her eyes, hoping to find some clue.  But even with these new pieces of the puzzle, she could not figure out what it was he was trying to tell her.  It was like he was opening himself in a way he never had before, stripping the last of the walls away and asking her acceptance.  _But why me?  Why bring me here, instead of her?_ She wondered. Her fingers itched to touch him, but his rigid form and clenched jaw kept her hands at her side. 

            "Why did you bring me here, Heero?"

            She saw him stiffen and square his shoulders.  "I wanted to end this." His voice sounded low and harsh.

            Her heart drowned.  Had she lost even his friendship?  "End what?" Her voice trembled with the question.  She held her breath waiting for his reply, but there was only silence as she stared at the floor.

            And suddenly, he was standing before her - so close she could smell the faint scent of his cologne.  The urge to reach out to him was so strong, it was almost tangible. Then she felt his hand under her chin, forcing her to look up at him in the faint light.  His eyes glittered strangely in the orange glow cast by the flickering flames.  "Don't push me away," he breathed and leaned forward to brush his lips against hers.

            The slight touch set off a chain reaction through her body. Tiny shivers threaded through her muscles and rippled her skin like a pebble skimming the surface of a pond.    She pulled away.  

"Heero, I…we can't.  It isn't right." Relena turned from him to try and hide the heartache he caused with the brief kiss.  She took a deep breath and forced herself to continue with what she had been longing to tell him for so many years.  

            "Heero, I have wanted to tell you this for, well, awhile now, but it was never the right time. And even now...I know it's not, but I just have to tell you how much I love you. I have always loved you, and I want you to be happy." Every breath felt like she was fighting an iron band around her lungs. She willed herself to go on.  "Even if it means letting you go."

There was silence for what seemed to be a long moment.  His hand grabbed her shoulder and he pulled her body around to face him.  She glanced up and met his gaze in the strange, wavering light.

He stared down at her, his eyes demanding what he had once been so bold as to ask for – her faith.  

_Believe in me, Relena._

Her eyes widened; she knew that look and could hear his voice in her mind.  "But…." She protested, unable to resolve the unspoken message with her reality.  "But you're engaged..."  

He moved his head from side to side, a slight smile of what seemed like amusement playing on his lips as he conveyed the message that she was mistaken.  

Relena's breath caught and this time she let her body relax into his arms when he pulled her into his embrace.

"I'm so sorry, Heero.  Duo told me you were getting married, and I…. Please forgive me, I didn't mean to hurt you," she said hugging him back and burying her face into his neck.  He sighed and closed his eyes.

They continued holding each other for several minutes before he finally released her and stepped away.  He moved back to the assortment lying on the ground, and threw the last of the pile, including the film reels, into the fire, rejuvenating the blaze.  His eyes flickered in the firelight, just watching his past disintegrate into so many ashes – the way the bodies of the soldiers he killed burned to ashes in the path of his gundam's buster rifle.   

A slight draft wafted by, and he realized she had moved away.  His heart quickened and he sought her with his eyes across the floor.  The artificial moon had turned on and was pouring its silvery light into the room from the window. He could just make out her form, walking towards him, the two journals she had found earlier in her arms.  

She came to a halt in front of the barrel. He stepped forward, unsure he could allow her to dispose of them.  Heero took the books from her, staring at each one for a moment. Scientific research and data that could be useful was contained in those journals.  But useful for what?  For creating another human weapon?

He looked up at her, their shadows moving about wildly on the far wall as the fire continued to burn brightly in anticipation of more sustenance.  Her blue eyes shone with life and love, as if she held the future in her very hands.  It almost made him smile.  The world didn't need another gundam pilot 01; Relena would make sure of that.

Having made his decision, Heero tossed the only remnants of his childhood into the hungry flames, then leaned down to capture her lips in a tender kiss.  

And as the night wore on, hungry flames dwindled into cooling embers. The dark shadows of the past seemed to melt into one, then slowly fade away.


	5. I deserved the reprimand, Relena I diso...

In the Arms of Another

By the Black Rose

AN: It's short, sweet (I hope), and to the point.  Here's an epilogue I wrote, but never posted on either my long-missing website (In Rose), or to the Love Reflection ML.  I've considered writing something of the citrus variety about the weekend they spent together, but it'll have to come later (and won't be posted to Fanfiction.net).   Thank you so much for reading.  Love, Rose

Epilogue

            Heero marched stiffly down the hallway towards Colonel Une's office.  The order to see her immediately upon his return had been waiting for him on his desk.  Even a fairly relaxing weekend couldn't relieve the tense hitch in his shoulders as his stomach swam with anxiety.  Demotion.  Already.  He set his jaw, and glared at the world.  But no matter what, it was worth it. 

"Have a good vacation?" Trowa asked falling into step with his friend.

            "Hn."

            "I take it the Colonel is unhappy with you."

            The former Zero pilot threw him a black look.  "I'm being reprimanded.  I have to go sign the paperwork on my demotion."

            Trowa's eyebrows shot up to his hairline.  "Isn't there…"

            "I disobeyed an order."

            "The orders weren't coming from her, that much was apparent." The two Preventers stopped just outside Une's office.  Heero's hand froze on the door handle.

            "Good day, Miss Une." Relena's muffled voice filtered out from the Colonel's office.  They stepped back as the door swung wide and the Vice Foreign Minister stepped out into the hallway.

            Heero just stared at her as she walked towards them, her light blue eyes darting up to meet his for a brief moment.  She smiled and nodded at him and then flicked her gaze over to Trowa.  "Good day gentlemen," she said and continued passed them.

            Heero turned and let his eyes follow her down the hall until she was no longer in his line of vision.  

"I wonder what she's doing here?" Heero spun back around.  Trowa was smiling like the cat who had swallowed the canary.  

            "Yuy, I'm busy, I'll have to reprimand you some other time."

            "Yes, Sir," Heero answered, quickly shutting the door to her office.  He turned and went off in the direction Relena had taken, completely forgetting his friend in the process.  Until the acrobat's words caught up with him: "It's about time."

****************************************************************

            He found her looking completely at ease in his office chair, leaning back into its dark blue cushions with closed eyes and a half smile on her lips.

            "How did you get in here?"

            Her eyelids snapped open.  "Heero," she said and sat up straight in his chair.

            "How did you get in here?"

            Her smile widened at his question.  "I know a few people.  Pulled a few strings.  It pays to have friends in high places," she said, her blue eyes sparkling with mischief.

            "Apparently." He shut the door behind him.

            The smile fell from her lips.  "Are you angry with me for interfering?"

            "I deserved the reprimand, Relena.  I disobeyed an order."

            A frown creased her delicate features.  "What good am I if I can't do at least this much to help you?"

            "Your office doesn't define you."

            "Well, no, but…"  She stood up and crossed over to where he was standing just inside the doorway.  She laid her hand on his arm.  "Are you really angry with me?"

            He shook his head and looked up from the floor.  "No.  The way I see it, you owed me."

            "What?" Her eyes widened.

            "Well," he said, standing up from his relaxed position against the wall and uncrossing his arms.  "If someone hadn't issued the orders to keep me away from her…" He stepped towards her, a dangerous scowl gripping his features.  She took two smaller steps back for every one he took forward.  "I wouldn't have had to resort to extreme measures."  He placed his hands flat on top of the desk on either side of where she had been foiled in her retreat, pinning her against the immovable object.  

            "So it's all my fault?" She arched an eyebrow at him; her gaze defiantly met his.  

            "Yeah," he said and lowered his lips to imprison hers in a much-desired kiss. 

            She broke away first, and leveled him with a glare.  "If you had told me how you felt, I wouldn't have believed Duo, and there would have been no need to keep you away from me."

            "You still would have believed him.  Women need…reassurance that I wouldn't have been able to provide considering the distance and opposing schedules."

            "Oh really? So that would be my fault, too?"

            Heero shrugged.  "So how are you going to make it up to me?"

            She blushed. "What? I thought I did, already. Getting you out of trouble."

            "That was just repayment for getting me into trouble in the first place.  You still owe me for believing Duo and dating someone else."

            "You got yourself into trouble.  And you never asked me to make a commitment to you.  I'm allowed to date other people…"

            "Hn.  Something I'll have to remedy, apparently." He stood up and turned away.  His heart was racing from being so close.  He wanted…things he still didn't know how to express.

            "What?"

            "Promise me, Relena."

            "Promise you what, Heero?"

            He bowed his head.  "I never want to go through that again. Losing you."

            "Heero, I…"  Her hand touched his shoulder; it still felt warm through the fabric of his uniform.  It brought to mind memories from their recent weekend together…

            "One day, I'll be the man you see in me." He turned to face her, gripping her hand in the palm of his. "Promise that you'll wait." His voice was a fierce whisper as he continued, his eyes staring deeply into hers.  "Promise me forever."

            She glanced down at where their fingers had intertwined before looking up again, and smiled.

"I promise."

**************************************************************

AN: I recently wrote a 1xR lemon called Darkness and Light.  I'll post the link in my bio, but here it is if you want to copy and paste the address:

http://www.blissfulignorance.com/phpBB/viewtopic.php?t=834

Thank you again, and many wishes for a happy holiday season.

Much love,

Rose


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